Despite me been at a point a few months back, maybe even weeks ago I was point blank sure that DBT wasn’t the right therapy for me at the moment. This is part of my recovery cycle, I resist change....you might even say I resist the stability because it scares me. When you can’t regulate your emotions easily and you haven’t got the skills to deal with certain situations, been happy or been stable can feel just as unsafe as been destabilised and suicidal.
Surprise surprise, DBT is giving me the skills I can use to live an emotionally healthy life. This week as always I’ve done homework for the group therapy. Building mastery has meant that I’m trying to do skills or hobbies that give me mastery! So uni reading, crafts, singing, yoga....and doing my blog.
As I write this I feel at this point DBT in itself is mastery. Everyday I’m building mastery to be able to cope and I feel the tables turning this week! If I keep recommitting by using skills and going to appts I can live the life I would like to live.
I guess breaking the cycle where I get to this point I’ve been at quite a few times before and using the skills to be mindful of not sabotaging to get the ‘safety’ of my behaviours back is a huge skill to have!
I just wish I hadn’t spent time undoing my life and resisting what would help me!
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Keeping going girl. Looking forward to reading all about you recovery. Keep up the hard work xx
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